Let me inspire you to just do something!
Here's my testimony of when I made that mental shift: Almost a year ago...I started a personal branding journey (see the post below). I basically went out to find myself in a very deliberate way. I took classes (dancing, acting, etc), read books, and surrounded myself with people who were pursing their dreams. I also took a break from relationships with potential lovers, friendships, and even relationships with certain family members who didn't align with my vision. My journey started on October 15 and ended on November 15th. During this time I also prayed and journaled about my desires and my gratitude. My goal was to discover me.
I always knew I was a creative, sensitive, empathic person. I just needed to figure out how to manifest those things in healthier ways. On the 2nd to last day of my journey (November 14th)...I found art. I had never had an interest in art before. But it just fit and felt good. So I stuck with it (something I had never done before). It brought me free therapy, an outlet for all of my feelings, it became my meditation, my way of talking to God, my way of relating to others, my way of being vulnerable. It all moved so quickly (and it still is moving quickly). I looked at others who had been doing art all of their lives who were more trained or talented than I who hadn't even sold a piece of art and I started to feel unworthy. Normally, I would've talked myself out of the possibilities. But it felt so good that I just had to continue to keep going. And I convinced myself I was worthy along the way. Doors opened (that I didn't even have to push open or fight to open), I made new friends, I made some money, but most importantly...I found peace and a piece of me that was missing. I had never looked at myself as a doer. I had mostly dated men who were entrepreneurs, businessmen, white collar professionals, money-makers, and I envied their drive, ambition and the fact that they could stick with something and watch it flourish. I had tried and failed many times. I wasn't a doer. Just a procrastinator.
But this time was different. I began to embody the traits that I envied in others. I became a doer too. I was no longer that procrastinator watching others excel at reaching their dreams. I learned to inspire and motivate my own damn self.
I'll keep this short (although I have lots to share). But it pains me to watch others struggle with self-doubt and block their own blessings. So I'm hoping to encourage someone to try again. Try doing that thing that you've always dreamt of doing. Oftentimes we are told that our goals are unrealistic. It's ok to be unrealistic at times. If it makes you happy, chase that shit! Disregard what others say to you. And more importantly disregard your own thoughts. Your mind will betray you because it wants to keep you shielded from disappointment and failure. So screw those negative thoughts and keep going. Surround yourself with people who uplift you. Also, remind yourself that there's room for everyone. Even if someone is already doing what you're doing....they ain't you. So go for it!
This post isn't here to imply that I've somehow made it, that I'm somehow wildly successful, or that I'm raking in tons of money. I'm not. I'm still working for the man and paying my bills by helping to build someone else's empire. But I'm one step closer to building my own...and only my own. I have something of my own to look forward to daily. I can sell a bowtie or create a painting for someone and be inspired that every time they look at it....they think of me. I somehow made an imprint on their life, wardrobe, or a blank wall in their home. Quite honestly, I'm feeling myself. So I guess the best gift of all of this is an extremely pleasurable sense of self-love that being a mom, wife, girlfriend, friend, daughter, or employee couldn't provide.
I hope I have inspired you to go do something!
xoxo
Amina Leila
Feel free to share this with anyone who you think needs inspiration!
